I Like Big Mutts and I Cannot Lie

Greetings, all! Once again the two-legged folks have driven me insane and to the point of going public with all of their griping. While a new topic of discussion was long over due after all their vaccine nonsense, this one got personal.


A sophisticated feline like myself enjoys having a pretty strict schedule. I start my mornings off by crunching on some pretty decent food these people put in a bowl for me followed by an hour of stalking, harassing, and running around for what seems like no apparent reason to the average observer (really there's a science to it, but we'll get to that later). Once the creatures and their pets begin arriving for whatever they're being dragged in here for I spend the majority of my time napping around the lobby, also planned so I'm available for any kind of scratch or rub from anyone that ventures in. I will warn you all though, pet me outside of those times and I will give you a piece of my mind while taking a piece of your finger. I told you, I'm sophisticated and like my schedule.


I do make sure to take time to interact with the staff here. We have an interesting relationship that has a delicate balance. I have to make sure I don't knock too many of their pens off the desks so I still get my treats throughout the day for my due diligence of guarding the hospital at night from burglars and insects. I've also figured out, however, that if I am needy enough a certain doctor will give me an extra treat or two.


Which brings me to our topic - Obesity in Animals. I for one love me a chubby puppy or kitten, they just roll around; it's very entertaining. I obviously consider myself to be a fit and trim fella with my 15lbs of twisted steel and cuddle appeal. That aimless running around I do, that's my workout routine - two laps down the pharmacy hall and 20 minutes of swatting at either balled up paper or dead bugs, whatever I can find. I guess I do owe some credit for my perfect physique to my feeders. Though I do miss being able to eat all day everyday, morning and evening meals aren't the worst - they actually fit nicely into my schedule.


Having the set up that I do, I'm able to easily see a lot that comes in and out of this place - big and small. The Danes obviously need to weigh more than the Chihuahuas, the difference is knowing how much is too much and how to adjust your pal's weight in a healthy way. Even though dropping 2-5 pounds doesn't sound like a lot or even that difficult, it can be. Be prepared for the biggest eyes you've ever seen when you only give us 1 cup of food compared to whatever that old scoop measured out to be. Oh and watch out during your dinner time, we will be looking for turned heads and dropped goodies as opportunities to cheat.


Being the smart cat that I am, I would definitely recommend speaking to one of our staff about developing a customized nutrition plan to follow at home for your pet. They actually have some pretty cool ideas, I guess. Plus, if you guys come in to talk to them about it, they'll finally leave me alone about it and give me more treats!


-C

No Need for Introductions

For those that don't know me, I'm Sir Cornelius, the Watchful Eye, the greeter to furry guests and their two legged friends of Southern Hills Animal Hospital in Roanoke, VA. Although I spend a lot of my time sleeping somewhere I shouldn't be, eating a plant, or chasing a bug, I do pick up on a lot that goes on in the world of animal care and medicine.

Around this time I do enjoy seeing all the tiny tots wagging their tails and purring in carriers on their first trip to the vet's office, before they know what's about to happen to them. Your clawed and pawed pal is about to experience the first of many visits where someone in a white coat with a weird necklace pokes and prods them all over and usually sticks them with something sharp. As much as it physically pains me to admit this, these annoying annual acts of torture actually keep me feeling great the other 364 days of the year, not to mention all the love and treats afterwards to make up for the emotional scarring.

All day long, or the cumulative 5 hours I'm not napping or knocking something off a desk, I hear the cranberry clad crew speak to the critter chauffeurs about "vaccines" and prevention," It's enough to drive anything with ears, even if they are mildly deformed, insane. But at the end of the day, I suppose they do have a point. You wouldn't know it by my appearance, but I have definitely seen my fair share of peers that did not take that scary man or woman in the white coat's advice when it comes to these infuriating chores of getting stuck at least once a year or applying some smelly oil that completely ruins the glossy look to my fur or making me take some nasty treat every month.

I digress.

The point is, and I've never been one for making points, what's one day of utter annoyance compared to days if not weeks of complete agony, not to mention the looks of shame from your person when they have that argument inside their head of whether or not you're worth all this trouble and money. After all the head shakes, sighs, and transactions, you're finally taken back to your own territory, an environment where your owner vows to never miss a vaccine, or not buy prevention. The reasons are in the names, vaccinate us against the nastiness that can be found anywhere, prevent me from housing creatures smaller and more annoying than myself on my worst day. So why not skip that extra step of having to either leave us at some strange place that smells just a little too clean or constantly tricking us into cars that we all know are going back to "that place" by being proactive?

Just some thoughts from your usually friendly, neighborhood, one-eyed, crinkled eared feline

-C

"Now going paperless!"